Thursday, October 22, 2009

It's Not You, It's Me

Omg I'm a terrible blogger. I've become the blog person I hate - get people interested, then leave 'em hanging. Will you ever forgive me? Are you even still checking? I'm sorry! Things have actually settled down a bit - Jenny is doing ok at the in-home daycare, but still cries when I drop her off so that stresses me out despite the fact I know that SHE'S FINE. Yes, normal separation anxiety, it's all very healthy, normal to be still adjusting, whatever. It's still a sad little face boo-hooing when I have to pry her off my leg. And I've been reminded that I still need to find a permanent solution come January. Which stresses me out all over again, especially when I realize that due to my parent's Thanksgiving visit and some work travel, Jelly won't need care for 3 weeks straight, and if I were smart I would have her finish at Miss N's in mid-November and start her in the new place when we get back in early December. Which would mean I would need to find her new place, uh, next week, prior to paying Miss N for November. I would personally prefer to pretend that I don't have to deal with any of this at all, and that childcare fairies will take care of things. Or I'll win lots of money despite never playing any sort of lottery.

I went on another lame internet date, and realized the problem is not the lame internet dudes - it's me. I like the nerdy boys, the nerdy boys aren't exactly social butterflies, therefore I get all irritated on dates when they don't ask me any questions about myself OR MY PRECIOUS BABY. Seriously, it's a game now. If an hour goes by, I casually mention her, let it hang there, and move on. Wait a few minutes, then do it again. So far, neither guy has asked me about my job, or Jellybean, or how I came to be such a gorgeous total package. It's making me crazy. Also, last night, my jeans were unzipped for most of dinner and I accidentally blew a snot bubble in mid-sentence. None of my pants fit right - I sit down, and the zipper gaps open. I was like, 'uh-oh, I'm out!'. Luckily I was wearing a long shirt so could make it to the restroom to wrangle some pants control. And blow my nose. It's this crazy weather, not my fault!

Work has stressed me out to the point of shut down, which is never a good thing. I play Facebook apps and wake up in the middle of the night from dreaming I've missed an important conference call. Any tips for re-focussing would be greatly appreciated (like, reminding me that it would really suck to lose my job maybe?).

Jenny continues to morph into a toddler. One day she LOVES something, the next she DESPISES it. This is true of television shows, food, ponies, clothes, toys, activities, and clocks. Yes, she hates the kitchen clock suddenly - I have to take it down from the wall and put it in the pantry or she won't eat that 1/2 piece of teeny tiny boiled carrot that she calls dinner. She's also throwing more temper tantrums, which personally is pretty hilarious. I'm not insensitive - I offer to lay down on the floor and cry and kick along with her. She does not think I'm funny. Her new favorite thing EVER! is to play in the car. She can get the keys in the ignition and turn on the radio, so I figure she's almost ready to move out on her own. Her language skills continue to explode - people's names, phrases. She likes to point at things and say, 'See!' to get my attention. Which is WAY better than grunting, and cute as a button.

The next few months are busy ones - it's apparently birthday party season in my awesome mommies group, and there's holiday stuff (Halloween, Thanksgiving - and then - CHRISTMAS!!!), and we went to the fair, and the cooler weather is freaking fantastic. Except for the extra boogers.

And now, to copy my sister, say 'Click'!


Heather said...

GREAT pictures! (my favorite is the last one) SO cute!!!

The Ta said...

Where is the most freakin' awesone vid of me and my friend on the slide at the fair?!?!?!?

The Ta said...

and..... she also says "Beau" and "Boo"... each time they blink, but it's still darn cute!!

Genkicat said...

Nice to have you back - and I love the pictures!

Rector Funhouse said...

I did stop checking actually but now I'm back. Congrats on the dating, although it sounds painful. Congrats on the toddler, although it sounds painful. Congrats on being relatively sane (and apparently having a clean house) while being a single mom. Never knew it was going to be this hard, did we?!